Dear Baby Girl,
Today you are seven months old and with every day that passes you are learning or doing something new. I stand back sometimes and watch as you take in your surroundings or test your limits, and I think about all of the times to come that you will tiptoe on the edge of indecision and test your boundaries.
As you army crawl across the floor looking over your shoulder to see if we are watching, I think that soon you will be taking your first timid steps. As you look around the garage like it’s the first time you’ve been there, I think about you taking in the sights of the playground your first day at school. And, as you giggle and play with your daddy, I think about you running across the yard with your friends.
As I wonder about what kind of kid you are going to be, I think about what kind of mother I will be. In wanting what’s best for you, will I push you too hard? Will I miss your milestones and special moments because of important meetings or conference calls that run long? Will I give in too quickly when you beg for a cell phone or to stay out late because I want you to fit in with your friends? Will I raise you to be kind to others and to stand up when someone is unkind to you or someone you care about? When you’re a teenager facing tough decisions and situations that are more grown up than you are, will you trust me enough to confide in me?
This parenting thing is a heavy responsibility. One that I didn’t realize until maybe just recently. God has given me a precious gift in you and is trusting that I will be the mother that you deserve. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t worry about failing you, your father and our family. But when the doubt stirs, in the form of frustration, feeling overwhelmed or by thinking of all the things that can go wrong; I look at your face, say a prayer and whisper a promise that I will always do what is best for you.
We’re riding life out on a wing and a prayer, kiddo. I wish I could say I had all the answers and I knew what was in store for us, but I simply don’t. I don’t know what challenges we will face or what answers we will find. But we will find them together. That I promise you.
I love you, baby girl.
PS. Child, you are getting to be a handful. Remember when you used to sit still for your monthly pictures? No? Well, me either.
{ 2 comments }
I love that you write these monthly letters. Absolutely love it. Remind me when I have a nug (in like 100 years) to do this, k?
She’s edible. I just want to eat her up! And her name fits her PERFECTLY!
how about that? 2 comments that haven’t been cracked out. I’m losing my steam!
How sweet. She is getting to big and I love her little smile. I also love that bear.
I picture Bella going to school all the time. And then I start crying. The other night it was ridiculous – I actually had to remind myself she’s only 5 months old so I could knock it off for a while.
But you know – it will be here before we can even blink.
You’re a great mom. I’m sure she’ll grow up and treat you like her best friend.
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